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Apr 262016
 

Control the impulses is not an easy task, but it’s not impossible

Novels, music, advertisements, billboards, a walk in the Mall. Scenes, events, situations and moments that often are filled with a “mega-power-sex appeal”, that is, sexual stimulation for all tastes! We are provoked to see sex everywhere!

Surviving this scenario becomes, indeed, a “Space Odyssey”, a “Star Wars”, because it seems that, at all times, we are called to a kind of shadow of evil, the Anakin to become Darth Vader. Oh, my God, how to control so many sexual urges, at all times, are we encouraged to extinguish? them

Some steps to survive this crazy scenario.

como-dominar-os-impulsos-sexuais

First step: control and not master

I don’t really like the word “dominate”, sounds like a bad thing, that needs to be contained, repressed, and I don’t think God is so unfair to the point of placing, within us the sexual urges and require of us the suppression of them. I don’t believe that He asks us to dominate as if they were an “evil force” to be exorcised.

I prefer the word “control”, that is, how to control sexual impulses? Control is the mechanism by which we measure the result of a process by comparing it to a desired value. So, to control sexual urges is to be able to live with the desires, the will to impart the value that we have and the value we give to each other. When we leave the relationship of value, we can control the impulses and thus give them a purpose that is more full and enjoyable.

Second step: channeling the wishes

We are men and women with desires. Sexual impulses are not something disconnected from us, but they say our identity. I’m going further: they say our identity as children of God.

The Lord created us men and women. There is no “God, take me the sexual desires.”. No! I’m sorry to say, but He does not take them away. They are there to be channelled. They are the desires that lead a man to meet a woman, they are impulses, forces that cause us to live a relationship. What we need to ask is: “God, help us to channel these sexual desires for a full and healthy life. Teach us to channel our feelings, based on the value that we have and we possess “. If we have very clear, in the head and the heart, that we are called to live a full, faithful love, free and fruitful, we will give account to channel our impulses to total, faithful relationships, free and fruitful. When the sexual impulse comes, wanting the other to us, we can, at this time, use this strength for the other as someone who deserves our love, and whom we value!

In front of a beautiful woman, I call your attention – sexually – you can:

a) look, and bring to your mind as a possibility to touch, manipulate and get pleasure! Or;

b) look, appreciate and bring to your mind as a reality to love, cherish and promote.

You choose (a) or (b), namely, to see a beautiful woman, you had the sex drive, the attraction, the desire for her, but, at this time, choosing the alternative (b), channeled that impulse and have ennobled, not the repressing. Gave her a place of nobility. You know that Bible passage that says: “is it from the human heart that come out good and bad things?” So, you see, and it is the heart, gives the momentum from which emerges. Choice (a) or (b).

Third step: get to know the strength of the force.

We all have sexual urges. It is inherent in our being. But we need to know those impulses, know their strength, that is, to know when they come, when they more or less intense, what they do within us, what to do when they come. To know them is the best way to control them, and identify them is the best way to find a destination for them. People lose this battle as they want to fight against something they don’t know. This is not a fight against evil, but rather to integrate this part of you. It’s a struggle to join: sex drive + value + love + God. So on! Without self-knowledge there is no victory.

Fourth step: Flee or face?

When we know our sexual urges, the strength they have, the place and the situations where you want to take us, we could be at a crossroad: face then or escape? In fact, both. Face it, take note or flee, that is, to live this process that happens after the “face”, that is, understand and, later, to know that we care, run away. But knowing what’s running.

Many times, we didn’t hear the rolling movement inside and we were more tied to relationships for fear of ourselves. Flee, knowing and seeking to understand what we’re running from, to be stronger for the next fight. Because it’s coming! At this point, you have to ask yourself: what are my weaknesses? Where I’m more vulnerable? What do you clutter affectively? Once again, knowing is the art of control.

Fifth step: Returning to the State of the Jedi

In the episode of the Return of the Jedi ‘, we can see how Luke believes in the goodness that exists even in Darth Vader; and believe that we are in a fantastic scene, the “redemption of Vader”. While the Emperor Palpatine was to kill Luke with a final blast, Darth Vader, with his arm, or better, with what’s left of him, grabs Palpatine and throws him into the death star’s main reactor, destroying, definitely, the evil Lord of the Sith, so completing the prophecy in which the Sith are exterminated.

Vader becomes, again, Anakin Skywalker. Yes, he’s back to being what it was! And what does this have to do with control of our sex drive? Everything! Many times, we’re like young Anakin, who was swayed by corruption of evil. We sometimes let ourselves take corruption of pornography, sex outside of marriage; Anyway, for a sex life without the mark of true love as God thought; Consequently, we live like Darth Vader, slaves of our impulses and not their masters.

So, I want to tell you: we can always start over. There are, in our hearts, a deep desire to love and live the fullness of who we are. Our affections, desires and wishes, ordered to true love, always make you return to the best we have and are. The sacrament of confession, the Eucharist, a sincere prayer life and a good spiritual director are our weapons to win. Even when reading this text you feel unable to give a Christian answer before a lifetime of mistakes, I want to tell you that is what remains of an arm that Darth Vader won the Emperor of evil. I believe in you, much more than an arm, remains the desire to be happy and love of truth. So, don’t waste your time and start over!

Be open to conquer the sky!

Adriano Gonçalves

Adriano Gonçalves dos Santos is member of Canção Nova. He studied Philosophy at the Institute of community and academic psychology is on Unisal (Lorraine). Acts on TV Canção Nova as host of the Jesus Revolution. More than one program, the Jesus Revolution is an assignment that challenges the young man to be holy to be young. In this way, proposes a new generation: the generation of Saints of Jeans. He is the author of several books published by Canção Nova in Portuguese

 Posted by at 01:01
Oct 232015
 
logorevolfinalYou know that day you lost something very important and not sure where to put it? That important document that ensures his place in that job, or that optional that you’ve just been approved.
You know those days that you are super late for an appointment and just can’t remember where you put your car keys and even start sweating cold of so much anguish?
Losing something always causes a bad feeling, anguish, it is heartbreaking. So it also in when we lose someone.
When Mary Magdalene went to the Tomb in the morning, her heart was so feeling the loss of the Lord. She asks a question.
That same thing often happens when we lose something:
Where did they put it? Where is it?
The question of the heart of Mary Magdalene was so involved in the pain of loss:
Where did they put my Lord?
It wasn’t only the loss of someone, or something, it was the loss of the sense of hope, sure. He had died and the hole in her heart was aching. Who could cap it? What to do? How to live like this? A pain so great that it took until the vision of heaven, she had because she talked to the angels and did not realize that they were angels. She looked at Jesus and thought he was a gardener; she didn’t recognize him. The pain of loss spoke louder and took away the ability to recognize the Christ.
But everything changes when he calls her by the name “Mary”. It wasn’t a call either, it was a way of saying: “I see you as the only” “you’re irreplaceable” “I’m here”.
I believe that this split second Mary did what many of us do when we lose something:
“We’re doing a retrospective of our steps, we passed, who was present, all in order to remember where you left off what we are looking for”
Yes, at that moment that Jesus called her by name, she did a retrospective of each moment lived with him, every second, which meant and that opened worlds unknown of love and mercy. And so, she can say: master, my hope!
We are living the same days of Magdalene, where did they put my Lord, my hope?
Don’t be afraid to take a look at the past and say: Master!
That no piece of our history stays indifferent to strength of the risen one! He’s here in the heart!
I want to with you say like Mary, I have seen the Lord!
Share in what situation you can say: I saw the Lord.
 Posted by at 01:01
Oct 092015
 

When it comes to dating, soon one thinks a lot of the type of ideas of ‘ I can ‘ or ‘I cannot ‘. More than that, they want to put in your head that dating needs to be a “test drive” of the other to see how, in fact, we can take ourselves to the maximum of pleasure!

10 formas de amar minha namorada sem sexo - 940x500

I’m going to cut to the chase and talk to the men on duty to love their girlfriends, and not use them I say to  you: “it’s possible to love your girlfriend without having sex with her. Yes, you can make her feel deeply desired, beloved and happy without having to appeal to a sexual relationship before the wedding.

Okay! This text fell into your hands and you don’t believe in this “story” of the last century. But I want to challenge you to go to the bottom of this page, because you can be living a lie in your relationship, you may be mistaken, thinking you’re loving your girlfriend when you take her to the motel or behind closed doors for the adventures of a sex without love.

 

 

Love is hope and it gives you each to the other, and not wanting the other to you. Without much ADO, 10 ways to love her without having sex with her before the wedding:

Love the look: Exercise the ability to see her as a Princess, as a daughter of God, as someone who, in fact, possesses unimaginable virtues. Exercise the ability to demonstrate in you eyes how important she is to you and how your life gains meaning when you spend time looking at her. After all, since you spent more than 5 minutes looking at into her eyes as she looks into yours?

Love at the hearing: Women like to talk, talk and talk. And we men need to exercise the ability to listen to even what they don’t say in a verbal way. Most women want us men to “guess” and spend time listening to what she says. When you do that, you will have discovered the golden thread of the relationship.

Love the feel: Before you feel the naked body of your girlfriend (there is a time reserved for this, that’s called marriage), how about feeling her heart? The  deepest penetration that you may have with her will not be the intercourse, but will be when penetrating in her heart and so feel the feelings that she has!

Love in the play: Our big “Boggle”, while men (unfortunately, the society in the way like that) is touching the girl’s body, in order to achieve the most erogenous parts of it and thus leave it ready for a sexual relationship. But that, in dating, is use and not love. Want to love your girlfriend for real? Spend time listening to her history, in which she lived and lives.

Love in the embrace: As a hug is effective in the art of love! A woman surrounded by a hug that involves not only your body, but has the ability to surround her completely, she feels not only protected, but deeply valued. So your arms have the ability to involve all mystery and beauty of your girlfriend?

Love the Kiss: Kissing is very good! A kiss is more than meeting of lips, it is meeting of wishes and desires. Exercise in giving kisses to your girlfriend in the ability to awaken her to the joy of being together. A woman found in a kiss feels unique and unrepeatable.

Love the smell: Don’t go thinking that I’m talking about French fragrance! Of course this is very nice too. But it’s not just that, I mean feel what Paul said: “Because for God are the good scent of Christ (II Cor 2.15). Feel the fragrance of Jesus, of love, of dreams that he brings, will make her irreplaceable.

Love in the talk: Since Eve, the woman waiting to talk to a man. It was in the absence of talk about Adam Eve chose a bad path. I know we’re not so good at talking, and that’s just our greatest weapon. Exercise the ability to demonstrate your feelings, talk about what you think. Don’t bother to say “I love you”. As said Pier Giorgio, “love never says ‘ enough ‘!”. Talk to her in your dreams, your desires, the importance that it has in your life! If we knew the strength of our voice.

Love in thinking: I believe that one of the greatest proof of love is trying to think about what others think. I’m not saying think like, but get to the place that the other thinks. And when it comes to your girlfriend, thinking about what she thinks is having the ability to get your deepest motivations. After thinking about her thoughts, your actions will be far more assertive.

Love in the dream: When you spend time dreaming, projecting the future. When you have the possibility to dream along with your girlfriend, the future presents itself full of possibilities. Not having sex in dating makes you dream a lot more still with her of the wedding night! Love her in dreams it brings – and tell you are not few. And when she feels that you dream with her, I assure you: you mirarão Heaven in yourselves!

Think little? If you put this goal of love in your relationship, you will be very happy to be making her happy! And after you are married, each sexual intercourse will be overflowing with all these forms of love, as they converge and so will ring in the fullness of love.

And there? After these 10 ways to love without having sex in dating, I ask you: do you love your girlfriend?

Many marriages, when they resolve to live chastity, split up; not because it wasn’t such a good idea, but it was an action that revealed a relationship that had no people, but just “sex”.

 

Adriano Gonçalves

Adriano Gonçalves dos Santos from Minas Gerais, Brazil is member of the Canção Nova . He studied Philosophy at the Institute of community and academic psychology is on Unisal (Lorraine). His is the host of the Revolução Jesus (Jesus Revolution) on Canção Nova TV. More than one program, the Jesus Revolution is an assignment that challenges the young man to be holy even when he is young. This way, he proposes to a new generation: the generation of Saints in Jeans. He is the author of several books.

Portuguese Version

 

 Posted by at 01:01
Sep 252015
 

[Many times we hear of radicalized youth who are committed to violence. However, Catholic youth called to be as radical as Christ are exactly the opposite. We are called not to destroy but to build up. Not to take another’s life, but to give of ourselves. Adriano Gonçalves touches on this in his column for Revolução Jesus, a youth based movement from Canção Nova in Brazil.—.ed]

In times where being called radical does not resound very well, I decided to throw a question on Twitter:

“What it means to be radical in [the Catholic] faith?”

The crowd reacted quickly and sent many took these answers:

“For me, it is seeking an authentic life, rooted in the Truth and which have as a consequence a great enthusiasm for living!”

“The radical term derives from the Latin radix, meaning” root “. In this case the root of faith. “

“Radical faith … is more than practical and spiritual exercises! To be radical is to have roots! And faith … is paradoxically BE FREE “

“To give oneself completely into the arms of Jesus” #tobeRadical #inFaith

I see it is this very thing that everybody said. The word “Radical” has its origin in the Latin radix term that means: root, foundation, origin. What does that mean? It’s simple! When you ask someone to be radical you want this person to go to the root of that with which he is involved, i.e., a radical Christian is one who goes to the root (base, foundation) of your Christian life that is Jesus Christ!

You know that song, “To love as Jesus loved, dream like Jesus dreamed … live as Jesus lived” that’s right. To be radical is to be another Christ.

And you think this is not radical?

Caramba! It is very radical.

Jesus invited the rejected.

Welcomed the despised.

He believed the discredited …

This is to be radical.

I see that now the need to raise a radical youth that have one desire: To be another Christ.

Love and surrender to Jesus to the point that we can say with Paul:

“It is not I who live, but Christ who lives in me”

Think of this truth … that changes everything.

Today lifted with this desire: To be radical, keep the roots. Be another Christ … The world needs this said, a lot of people who read a bible … how about proposing living our life with a living Gospel?

I’m in and are you?

Let commented here if you are you in or not. But start acting soon … Send this post to your youth group your friends, your college, family … And let’s raise a radical Catholic youth.

Tamu Together

Adriano Gonçalves

 Posted by at 01:01
Jun 042015
 

fernandaEvery woman has femininity impressed in her being, characteristics of the genre, which builds her person. Motherhood is at the center of female identity that leads to careful attitudes, goodness, kindness, gentleness, courage and many other features. I speak not of biological maternity only, because I would be depreciating the fertility of so many young women who live a consecrated life in convents. The desire to care for others, to educate, train, love is natural in us, not that it is not in man, but in the woman it is more acute. As children we played dolls, while boys play with cars. It is a natural human tendency.

Will you have allowed such virtues such virtues that are in the embryo to flow into your being? Or will you have denied such qualities for unknown reasons? Traveling through several states of Brazil conducting lectures, visits and prayers for the young people I realize that the current generation of girls tend to have more aggressive attitudes. The posture, way of dressing, talking and makeup demonstrate a denial of that femininity. It’s like if I were to assume this identity I would be being weak or fragile. And that’s a lie! The more sweet, polite, feminine, the more you are stronger, safer and brave. It is the natural law of creation.

Excerpt from the book, ‘A mulher segundo o coração de Deus’ [‘The woman according to the heart of God’] by Fernanda Soares

Portuguese Version

 

 Posted by at 01:01
Feb 252015
 

escadaLuke 4:14 says that Jesus returned to Galilee with the power of the Holy Spirit. Here we see that He let himself be led by the Spirit, it was the Spirit who directed his life, so that He was announcing the good news to every corner and it was the Spirit who showed him where to go. The consequence of this docility of Jesus was the outreach to the poor, the prisoners and the sick of soul and body.
What has been lacking to us Christians is the docility of being led by the Spirit. We no longer ask what God wants for us, what He wants to say. The consequence is not the release of our family or loved ones, but fights, intrigues and unforgiveness

.
We need to take life in the Spirit, and ask Him what to do or even what to say. These times require us to be anointed by the Spirit (He is God’s promise to not leave us orphans. (Cf the chapter in John 14).
We are not orphans, for the Father first loved us (I John 4;. 19), so He gave us his Spirit to advise us, to heal our wounds caused by our bad choices or what people did to us.


Kind Regards,

Junio ​​Rui dos Santos
Canção Nova Community

Portuguese Version

 Posted by at 01:01
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